Explaining Deployment to Young Children: A Guide for Parents

Deployment is a challenging time for families, especially for young children who may not fully understand why a parent has to leave. Explaining this complex situation in a way that is reassuring and comprehensible for young minds can make a significant difference in how they cope with the separation. Here are some tips and resources to help parents navigate this conversation.

1. Use Simple, Clear Language

Be Honest but Age-Appropriate:

Use words and concepts that match your child’s developmental level. For example, you might say, “Mommy/Daddy has a very important job to do, and they have to go far away for a little while to help keep us all safe.

Reassure Them:

Emphasize that the deployment is temporary and that the parent will return home. Explain the length of deployment in terms they can understand, such as counting down on a calendar.

2. Create a Communication Plan

Regular Communication:

Establish a routine for communication, whether it’s through video calls, phone calls, letters, or emails. Knowing when they can expect to hear from the deployed parent can provide comfort and stability.

Special Messages:

Encourage the deployed parent to leave behind special notes, videos, or recordings for the child to access when they’re feeling particularly sad or missing their parent.

3. Maintain Routines

Stability is Key:

Keeping daily routines consistent helps children feel secure. Regular meal times, bedtimes, and activities provide a sense of normalcy.

Involve Them in Planning:

Let children help in creating a deployment calendar or decorating care packages. This gives them a sense of involvement and control.

4. Use Books and Resources

Children’s Books:

Stories can be powerful tools for explaining complex situations. One highly recommended book is *As Much As the Stars*, a children’s picture book about deployment - release date = November 11, 2024. This beautifully illustrated book helps young readers understand the emotions and experiences associated with a parent's departure and return.

Interactive Tools:

Websites like [Sesame Street for Military Families](https://sesamestreetformilitaryfamilies.org/) offer videos, activities, and tips designed to help children cope with deployment.

5. Provide Emotional Support

Encourage Expression:

Allow your child to express their feelings openly. They might feel sad, angry, or confused, and it’s important to validate these emotions.

Seek Support:

Connect with other military families, support groups, or counselors who understand the unique challenges of deployment. Sometimes, knowing they are not alone can be a great comfort to both children and parents.

6. Celebrate Milestones Together

Mark Important Dates:

Celebrate birthdays, holidays, and milestones with the deployed parent, even if it’s virtually. Sending a birthday video or sharing a special meal over a video call can create meaningful memories.

Welcome Home Preparations:

Plan a welcome home celebration together. This gives the child something positive to look forward to and can help ease the transition when the parent returns.

In summary, while deployment can be a difficult period for families, especially for young children, there are many ways to support them through it. Clear communication, maintaining routines, using helpful resources like *As Much As the Stars*, and providing emotional support can make a significant difference. Remember, you are not alone, and there are many tools and communities ready to help you and your child navigate this challenging time.

Remember, love knows no distance. ❤️

Always,

Tricia Stone-Shumaker

Blue Star Mom

Army West Point Mom

Air Force Mom

www.asmuchasthestars.com

author@asmuchasthestars.com

Highlighting As Much As the Stars

As Much As the Stars, is an invaluable resource for families experiencing deployment. The release date is set for November 11, 2024. The book beautifully captures the love and connection that remains strong despite the physical distance. It provides comfort to children, helping them understand that their parent's absence is due to a noble cause, and their love stretches across the miles.

The accompanying coloring book, available through [As Much As the Stars website](http://www.asmuchasthestars.com), offers an interactive way for children to engage with the story and express their feelings through art. Additionally, the monthly subscriber drawing adds an element of excitement and community for families following the book's updates.